Titch’s ambition is to be a loan shark. He tried being a slum landlord but failed miserably because no one took seriously his threat to tidy their bedrooms, knowing damn well he’d never get through the door. His cunning plan involves borrowing some cash from his dad, then lending it out to his mates at exorbitant rates, and when they can’t pay asking very nicely if he could have it back please.

In the meanwhile, he is trying to evict his tenants by turning his own bedroom into a recording studio and making horrible noises all night with his new "Concert Mate Pro" keyboard.

The racket is so poor that James Fenn, one of his oldest tenants, has been forced to call the Police on numerous occasions, but was thwarted in his attempts to make a "dirty protest" in his bedroom because nobody noticed.

Titch’s forthcoming European tour with rock band "Death in Vegas" is eagerly anticipated by music lovers in the Swinford Gardens area.

Titch Loves:
Cheese, Cooking, Travel, Filling in forms, Gadgets.

James hates:
Fenn’s bedroom, Parsnips, People who like filling in forms, Gadgets that don’t work, Clarinets (misery sticks).

Contact: Titch@vocaholic.co.uk